home sick

It's official guys, I won't ever find anyone stable here. Party last night was dull. 3 guys. Ok? 3 GUYS came up to me. Urgh... At least one of them was ridiculously cute :) But even then, that's probably not gonna work out. So whatever.

All the same, I've got another party to go for tonight. So yea... We'll see how that goes eh? I begin to think I need to exercise SHIT LOADS more restraint. Literally, SHIT LOADS. Because all this is getting really out of hand and I really really really don't need this now. In fact, it's the last thing I need. Not after hearing about everything that's happening at home.... Damn it.... I somehow feel that thing's will get better if I were home.

ARGH

You're right Geoff, it's not funny anymore. I swear I attract the stupidest bunch of guys. And I thought being attached would be good for me. All things considering. BUT! BUT IT IS NOT! Especially when you're not really attached when you thought you were and the guy you thought you were with was genuine and sweet BUT in actuality is not.

Jess, you were right. That conversation we had about the states and the land of Hollywood itself? You were right. I didn't DO anything but you're entitled to kill me before I kill myself.

JACK FUCKIN ASSES.

new country, new everything

Went to Vic Market yesterday with Chris, Davinka and Hadija (I swear I'm getting her name all wrong). Davinka and Hadija left early though while Chris and I ate at this place that he calls Sandwhich Alley. I can't quite remember what it's actual name was though. We came back to my apt with beer and Tank Girl! w00t!

I can't remember what time I slept or what I time I woke up or what time my housemates slept. Argh... Oh well... I blame the Vodka and the Gin so whatever. :P Gawd I suck! Oh well...

muahahahaha

Someone? And me? Hmmmm... I do not know... Anyways, Julien told Rick he doesn't appreciate him talking to me ahahaha! Now THAT was funny!

Nick left this morning so yea... He's going back to the states. :P Last night was a bit of a mess. Jada, Madhavi, Chris and I were gonna head out to Chapellis but in the end, we landed up going to McDonalds. Oh well... but at the end of it I was so tired I swear. Speaking of Chris, where the hell is he?! We're sposed to go to Queen Vic Market today... Anyways, the song ringing in my head now....

Uh huh, this my shit
All the girls stamp your feet like this

Chorus [x2]:
Few times I've been around that track
So it's not just gonna happen like that
Cuz I ain't no hollaback girl
I ain't no hollaback girl

Ooooh ooh, this my shit,this my shit [x4]

I heard that'chu were talking shit
And you didn't think that I would hear it
People hear you talking like that, getting everybody fired up
So I'm ready to attack, gonna lead the pack
Gonna get a touchdown, gonna take you out
That's right, put your pom-poms down, getting everybody fired up


Chorus [x2]:
Few times I've been around that track
So it's not just gonna happen like that
Cuz I ain't no hollaback girl
I ain't no hollaback girl

Ooooh ooh, this my shit,this my shit[x4]

So that's right dude, meet me at the bleachers
No principals, no student-teachers
Both of us wanna be the winner, but there can only be one
So I'm goina fight, gonna give it my all
Gonna make you fall, gonna sock it to ya
That's right, I'm the last one standing, and another one bites the dust

Chorus [x2]:
Few times I've been around that track
So it's not just gonna happen like that
Cuz I ain't no hollaback girl
I ain't no hollaback girl

Ooooh ooh, this my shit,this my shit [x4]

Let me hear you say, this sh*t is bananas, B-A-N-A-N-A-S!
This shit is bananas, B-A-N-A-N-A-S!
Again this shit is bananas, B-A-N-A-N-A-S!
This shit is bananas, B-A-N-A-N-A-S!

Chorus [x2]:
Few times I've been around that track
So it's not just gonna happen like that
Cuz I ain't no hollaback girl
I ain't no hollaback girl

Ooooh ooh, this my shit, this my shit [x4]

Hollaback Girl - Gwen Stefani :)

Don't you just want to scream? ?I don't understand why I feel so bored when I shouldn't be. I'm still in Melbourne. I still don't know much about the place. I strangely don't miss home too much and I don't understand it either. I mean the only times I feel like jumping on the plane is when I speak to Mel again. I miss him loads.

We got back at around 4. All of us took a maxi cab home and paid like 5 bucks each. Not bad eh? I got picked up AGAIN. I tell you why is it that I don't get picked up by the guys that I like? Ok fine there was one guy that looked remotely cute. Only problem is after after a while he was happily screaming in my ear and then I couldn't hear him and then my head was literally gonna explode. Heh...

But yea, so after stuffing my face like mad, I'm still hungry!!! ARGH!!! And I've run out of ham. :(Think I might go make ravioli later. I suppose this is what happens when I feel depressed. I get all edgy. This is also probably the effects of me not smoking. Heh...

I miss you... I miss you so much. I miss all the little things we used to do that we both took for granted... I'm going to make sure I hang out with you 5 times a week when I get home. Ok maybe not 5 times a week but I'm going to make sure that I spend more time with you. I feel like a lot of what's happened is my fault. Please be safe. I don't know what to do if something bad should every happen to you. I love you.

5:05:49 PM blue_waves1984@hotmail.com: we were talking 340am singapore time
Drey closed the conversation window. (5:06:51 PM)
5:07:35 PM blue_waves1984@hotmail.com: why le?
5:08:10 PM redrealm@undying-equilibrium.com: lol
5:08:16 PM redrealm@undying-equilibrium.com: he was talking to me before that
5:08:24 PM blue_waves1984@hotmail.com: yea n?
5:08:44 PM blue_waves1984@hotmail.com: tot u ni both knew that 5 mins ago
5:09:01 PM blue_waves1984@hotmail.com: wat's the joke?
5:09:20 PM redrealm@undying-equilibrium.com: i didnt know that
5:09:23 PM redrealm@undying-equilibrium.com: what's ur problem
5:09:34 PM blue_waves1984@hotmail.com: huh?
5:10:02 PM blue_waves1984@hotmail.com: my tone trhoughout this was slack n non-moody just zombie like
5:10:13 PM blue_waves1984@hotmail.com: u sound pissed
5:10:20 PM redrealm@undying-equilibrium.com: u think?
5:10:26 PM blue_waves1984@hotmail.com: huh?
5:10:43 PM blue_waves1984@hotmail.com: the part "what's ur problem"?
5:11:02 PM blue_waves1984@hotmail.com: what u mean by saying that? cos i seriously dunno what wrong thing i said if i pissed u off
5:11:31 PM redrealm@undying-equilibrium.com: roken Smile (blue_waves1984@hotmail.com)
PM 05:08
yea n?
PM 05:08
tot u ni both knew that 5 mins ago
PM 05:09
wat's the joke?
5:11:36 PM redrealm@undying-equilibrium.com: u really shld think before u say shit
5:11:37 PM redrealm@undying-equilibrium.com: anyways
5:11:39 PM redrealm@undying-equilibrium.com: im going out
5:11:40 PM redrealm@undying-equilibrium.com: bye
5:12:09 PM blue_waves1984@hotmail.com: hey, u really jump to conclusions man
5:12:39 PM blue_waves1984@hotmail.com: that was like my way of asking prompting to know why u lol, so there must be something funny right?
5:12:53 PM blue_waves1984@hotmail.com: u gotta chill man......u stressing me out when i wasn't at all
5:14:15 PM blue_waves1984@hotmail.com: and now i'm pissed cos i wasn't instigating fight or argument, and u point a sudden finger at me saying i'm some problme maker, YOU really should be the one to think beefore YOU say SHIT.

Hmm... What's it to me whether you're pissed at me or not? You'll pull a I'm not looking thing all over again and be really childish about it. Besides, I'm in Melbourne. What're you gonna do to me Audrey? Huh? What're you gonna do to me?

Exactly.

Nothing.

I'm sick of how everything has to be about you. So really, you can take you're snide remarks and tactless comments and shove it.

clubbing and stuff

It is impossible for me to club and have the time of my life because
1. it is ridiculously CROWDED
2. i keep getting weird people wanting to buy me drinks/cigarettes or they want to dance with me and I can't possibly be dancing with Anauld, Arthur, Sunil and Fabian all around me right?
3. Long Islands are only 14!!! And Sex on the Beach is 11!! Therefore I'd rather drink than dance ahahaha
4. Yes, I'm still sore for not being able to dacne with Nelly like Lindila and Netsai.... :(

nooooooooooooooo
DAMNIT!!! NELLY WAS DANCING WITH ONE OF THE GIRLS I KNOW!!! ARGHHHH!!!!
Mel is jealous. VERY jealous. And relatively pissed.

Good bye. I'm going to go club at Crown. HMPH!

clean cuts and bad boys

you won't believe how many good looking people ther are out there!! And I can't believe I didn't ask any of them for their numbers! Ahaha! Nah I'm kidding...

So far... I've met 2 outrageously good looking ones and one that's just plain intriguing. He's a little strange coz he's got a great smile but he doesn't seem to like smiling in pictures for some reason.

Ah well... Tonight... I club!! w00t!!

nelly

I am officially in love with R n B and Rap. More specifically, Nelly. :) Pity we didn't go the after concert party coz we had the invites and all coz Intan and Nadrin were tired and stuff. Johana and I wanted to go though... Anyways... I love Nelly :D

hmmm

I was watching Cruel Intensions and I just started thinking about Luke and Geoff and all the rubbish we get into. Ah... those were the days loves...

Tomorrow I go to the Nelly concert. Tomorrow I go to my FIRST Psychology class!! w00t w00t w00t!

Ok, I'm going back to freezing and missing my boys now...

Cheap drinks Cheap men

WHOA!!! I freaked out so badly!! Damn it. I should never ever remember my handphon number again! That was the 3rd time it happened and I stupidly keyed my number in. *sigh* And by the time the 4th happened, I said that I didn't have a phone. And that is gonna be my new excuse. I don't have a phone and the phone on me belongs to someone else.

Unless... well you know :)

heh

Another day... Another glass... And new people to meet. School was a waste of time. The only use it had was to let me run out to get my books. Heh... :)

I miss home...

You Are Buffy the Vampire Slayer "We saved the world. I say we have to party." What Superheroine Are You? Find the Love of Your Life (and More Love Quizzes) at Your New Romance.

breathing? yes. not quite...

Mom left today. about... 7 or 8 hours ago? No, I didn't cry at the airport. I stopped myself. I'm getting stronger I guess. I'm alive. I'll live. As long as I don't cry.

Uni starts tomorrow. So yea! How cool is that!

Ok enough with the faking. I miss home. I miss my friends. I miss Jon.. Cia... Judy... Luke... Kenny... Rick... Most of all, I miss my brother. I've prayed so hard that everything will be ok. I hope everything's ok back home. I still feel like people are reluctant to tell me what's going on and stuff. I guess I need things to be ok. Even for a little while. The same way I've sworn off sad movies for a month. And I've sworn off telling people about home for a couple of weeks.

Anyways... I wonder what ever happened to Elaine... I'll see her class tomorrow I guess :P

...

You need understanding.
In your life there has been many people that
could never seem too comprehend your
personality. Now you have either become an
out-cast because of their narrow minds or you
have adjusted yourself to them, and never
letting them see who you are deep inside. You
now think that no one will ever understand you
and you hate that fact. Though you are scared
of what the effects might be if you would
decide to let someone in so you keep a safe
distance that you both curse and bless.


What Do You Need in Your Life? [dark pics]
brought to you by Quizilla

sick....

Tav and I are sick. But I don't think she's as sick as I. Coz SHE IS OUT AND IM NOT!! ARGH!! I actually just want to go to Uni and get my books. But nooo I should stay in... BLAH.

But let's face it, by the time I get around to leaving the apartment, the shops would have closed! :P

So I stayed in. I'm feeling much better. A little worried about bandwidth and stuff. Never had to worry about it before though... Anyways, I guess I do feel better. No, I've not done anything stupid. But I do feel better. I love you guys.

Grad

So cute!!! Geoff in a SUIT! A gray SUIT!!!! And Pete in Red? And Marina style... on the phone..... But one thing though... and Shai in a tux-ish thing with a bow?! Ahahahaha! I get to make fun of you peple from MeLbourne tooo :D

Hmm

I had a strange dream. I dreamt that you were here. Now isn't that weird. You can't be here. You just... can't...I don't want you here either. But that was pretty weird.

Shit happens. It happens all the time. But why does it have to happen now. When I'm not home but I can't make sure that he's safe. Why now. Of all times. When none of us can help. it's infuriating. I don't know what to do. It's going to affect me and it's going to affect me very badly. And as it is, I'm falling sick. Again. Damnit. At least if I were home... It wouldn't be so bad. And I can't even ask why. I can only hope that it's not true. That or risk everything I have just for you. And I don't think sitting around hoping is going to solve anything now.

Apples and Pears

DARLINGS! LOOOOOOK!!! LOOK AT THIS!!!! I WANT!!! Oh well.. 99 AUD what to do...

Went to Chaddy.. Feeling even less Sociable than ever. What to do what to do... There are others less sociable than I... But I can't really do much coz well... Mummy's still here and all so yea... Haven't smoked in... 2 almost 3 days. It's eating at me but hey, a girls gotta do what a girl's gotta do.

I'm really happy where I am and I'm really happy with the decisions I've made. I've reconciled with old friends and can safely say I have no enemies anymore. Cept this one girl but that story isn't really a case of enemies. It's more childish than anything and I personally can't be bothered.

I was blog hopping today and talking to a couple of ex-classmates when it dawned upon me how insecure people really are. And how impossible it's beginning to seem to keep up with monogamy or faithfulness. I think it's pretty sad though... But I've got nothing and no one to worry about. And I'm not about to let it get me down so yea. I get increasingly irritated with people who bombard me with information that I really don't need especially while I'm so busy now. I'm even more busy than I was back home. So I have only this to say to those people, hang in there guys. Life is what you make it out to be. And if you make it out to be all about relationships or denial of love and stuff then you're shooting yourself. I'm not saying I never did that. In fact, I did. Part of me still is. Hang in there ok? We'll all pull through.

I'll blog later. Wanna read my Macworld first! (Yes Geoff, I HAVE IT! Only 7 bucks too!)

PS: I got picked up today. heh... But I didn't have my phone number on me. I've not gotten around to registering for it yet! Ahaha!

I haven't started and I give up

Mummy and I were drinking wine. Again. One of the few things we both enjoy doing -- having a quiet drink.

But yea... Before anything can happen I realise I need help. A lot of it. I am getting myself into huge messes. But oh well... :)

I go to enrol tomorrow. Wish me luck babes... Yes Geoff... I miss you too...

Phones and SIMs

I'm blogging using Widgets! Cooool!!! :D I'm still at a lost of which mobile plan to use with Optus. At the moment... I'm going to use prepaid I guess? And see how that goes? The website with details is here.

But then again, I kinda wanna get a permanent line. Know what I mean? But that's a whole other mess on it's own...

Argh... It'd only be 8-something back home... Damn it. my body IS readjusting. Ahaha...

Just got back from a couple of house parties. Well not really parties... One was a pre-drinks thing and the other was just a nothing else better to do thing. Besides the second one was right next to my place at Sunil and Alex's. It's alright I guess. Things are getting better. I'm beginning to really get into the swing of things. Don't miss home as much as I did. I still do but hey, I'm meeting a thousand new people and I've not hooked up with people like Jon and all even though I went to the Glen to have charcoal chicken which was AMAZINGLY GOOD. *ahem*

I crave pho. Uh oh... Anyways, my schedule is really beginning to fill up... And for the nights that I'm bored there's Jon to keep me company ahaha. (It's ok JoNny, I still lurve you even though ur busy with promoting different clubs and shit)

Anyways... Geoff... I played the thing again... Aiya.... :(

crap.... cover's been blown... so much for not letting them find out i smoke. blar... i should've known better eh? Anyways, met a whole bunch of cool people and we're all trudging down to Uni at... 8-something tomorrow morning. how nice.

too tired and lazy to blog. besides, i have to tip toe around my mum for a bit.

Found my Asian grocers. Beginning to feel very suffocated. I really need my space where someone isn't watching me. But... I don't want my mom to leave either. I guess I got complacent.

I am an official member of Crown Casino. Ahahaha. It's ok I guess... But I generally can't stand gambling. I did enjoy the Hoegaarden they had there though :) I know I should try other kinda of beer as opposed to the stuff I'm so used to but I really needed a little taste of home. (I say that every day...)

Box Hill is great. It's like... Hong Kong. Literally. Met a bunch of people too... The guy at Crown was cute! Hahaha... But yea... There's a Jap girl, a Viet one too and I think an American guy who lives next to me :) Haha... All the same, gotta run. Going to Great Ocean Road.

Oh. By the way, Love Me. IF You Dare. :)

I have just realised how stupid and unreasonable some people can be. They make use of you until they can find another idiot who will blindly believe them. It's quite sad that they somehow cannot just be honest. I find that to be amazing. Sure I've got my secrets but really, I don't have to lie to people to get close to them. I don't have to pretend I love them just so that they'd comfort me. I'll admit that I was one of those poor souls who got sucked in because I wanted to believe that something good could've come out of it. Evidently I was wrong but hey... I still want to believe that they're good people. A little misinformed and perhaps misguided but really, good people.

I still care. Not as blindly as I did before but I still care. And you're right, maybe once upon a time we did really love each other. But it's a maybe. Not to mention a once upon a time.

Another day another frozen memory. Fine... That sounds so corny but what do I care eh? I went to Box Hill!! And the City!! By public transport! Yes! I finally understand where and how this damned transport works!! :D We found sambal belachan!!!

Anyways, I spoke to Jon today :) I hope you are ok... Keep your chin up ya?

Oh and I chanced upon something quite amusing. haha... Apparently someone's trying to look Saf up. I wonder who... Anyways, they found me and Nethia and Nas and all. Found the funniest thing on Nethia's blog. Ah well... Annoying how no matter where I am or what I'm doing, the bugger keeps dragging me into messes. Well this isn't really a mess but you know what I mean don't you. :)

I wish you two luck. (AGAIN) And good bye and be happy and whatever. Coz I am!!!

Blogger always fucks up. *sigh*

I spent a good part of the evening trying to decipher the ridiculous transport system that is the metlink. There ARE NO STREET NAMES on the WEBSITE. It is quite amazing isn't it? But yes, I have figured out what where is. More or less. My mum and I went on the tram. Another irritating thing about it is this stupid card thing. They tell you to buy and then you don't use but then you pay exuberant amounts for it. Transport in Melbourne in my opinion is rigged in such a way that you have to know how to drive in order for anything to be remotely convenient. And then there's the matter of the traffic jams because everybody only seems to rush when they're trying to get home and at no other time. We shall see eh?

I have yet to call up my cousins or friends who are here. I keep thinking of doing it but then I realise that I can't because it's too ex for them to return the call unless I call from my desk phone but even then I don't understand the whole phone rate system. I shouldn't get charged differently for calling a handphone number right? I think. I don't know. I really don't know at this point. Very confusing. Heh...

And so if anyone really wants to know here are a list of things that I need/want/am trying to track down. Any form of monetary help would be greatly appreciated. (I know it won't really happen but it's worth a shot eh?)

- Plain biscuits
- Glue off
- Ice Cream (Preferably Ben and Jerry's newest flavour. The Oatmeal cookie one with the cinnamon. If you've not tried it, WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR?! GOGOGOGO!)
- CHEEZLE!!
- soup. Preferably broth-like soup in tins. Or something tasting REMOTELY Asian. Chinese otherwise. (wtf @ "Singapore Noodles". It does not exist!! It does not!!! The picture looks like friend mee kia!)
- Sausages (what else am I supposed to eat with my sambal??)
- More Sambal Belachan. ONE BOTTLE IS NOT ENOUGH!!
- Luncheon Meat. (What...)
- Neverwhere DVD (which I will be getting online at some point)
- Bacon (For those of you who remember and understand the inuendo associated with bacon, no. I still do not have bacon.)
- a new phone. This KNN is dying. Literally.

My brother did something very nice for me today. He actually went and did a little prayer thing. It's simple but it was sweet. So all of my immediate family, Adam included, spends a bit of time at 8pm Singapore time to pray. All at the same time. Now that is something sweet. Had to stop myself from flooding my room. Again. I know it's only gonna get harder when mom leaves. I'm trying to prep myself for it. I really am. But... I should live for now shouldn't I? I should.

Anyways, tomorrow I am going to try 2 different routes to get out to the city so that well... I know how to get there faster and when I need to, I can go disturb Shereena or something ahaha. Speaking of which... I still haven't called Jon or Anita. Heh... Ah well... I think I shall just hit friendster and let them know now :)

All the same, if you want to reach me, you SHOULD already know how.

I'm here. It's all good. I miss home. I miss you. I miss you so damned much that I wish I could have taken you with me. And I know you wanted to come. I know you would've done anything to have been able to come with me on this 'adventure' that I somehow don't want to be a part of anymore. I love you. I still have the message you sent me. I don't want to cry. I wish things were easier but they aren't. I wish I'dve known better. I wish I just went to NUS like everyone told me to. I wish I'd said yes when I had the chance.

I wonder how everyone is now. I'm too lagged to really write coherently. I miss home to much to focus on the matter at hand. On one hand I am totally looking forward to school and stuff but on the flip side, I don't want it to happen too quickly because then my mom is gonna have to leave then I'll really be alone. Room mates or no.

The place is alright I guess. It's not really that bad. I'm pretty sure I can handle it. I mean, how hard can it possibly get?

Don't answer that. Forget I even asked.

Anyways, to the people who ought to know who they are, I love you. You know how to reach me. :)

Oh oh, I just got my debit card done today. So I'll be getting it physically on Tuesday. (I get to order stuff online!!! w00t!!) I spoke to my mom about spirituality and religion and I think she's beginning to understand. And she's beginning to really trust me and in my strength. It's beginning to get chilly again. It's winter. Duh... But I kinda like it. I'm dealing with the weather here pretty well so far. But then again this is only the second night so who knows...

Jon, Jud... The readings... They were true. I mean... They are true. The ones about the airport. I knew what was going to happen. I knew I couldn't stop it even if I tried. I miss my brother so much. Geoff... I'm so happy that you two get along. It makes me really happy. I mean... Even if I had one or two people from home around me things would be a bit more bearable. But to another select few, I'm glad to be away from you and your false happiness/saddness/whatever. You are not worth my time. But what do I care? I've got more people in this world who care about me than you could ever have.

I'm going to see what my internet shopping capabilities are now like. ttyl babes!

FYI, just so that no one gets it wrong, my flight is at 7:45pm! I will only be at the airport at 5pm!!! Not 3!!!! Geoff, I dunno who told u 3!! :S

But ya, I'll be at Terminal 1 flying on QF 10 :)

I am The Hierophant The Hierophant often represents learning with experts or knowledgeable teachers. This card also stands for institutions and their values. The Hierophant is a symbol of the need to conform to rules or fixed situations. His appearance in a reading can show that you are struggling with a force that is not innovative, free-spirited or individual. Groups can be enriching or stifling, depending on circumstances. Sometimes we need to follow a program or embrace tradition, other times, we need to trust ourselves. For a full description of your card and other goodies, please visit LearnTarot.com

What tarot card are you? Enter your birthdate. Month: Day: Year:

I'm packing in some of my DVDs. I'm packing in quite a few things. I need to make sure I've got the little things that're gonna keep me together. I'm really looking forward to going now. I mean... Sure, I'm a little sad. But still, This will be good. I know it will be. I love this feeling of uncertainty. This feeling of leaping into the great beyond. I love you dad, mom, kor... I love you guys so much. You're support means the world to me.

This is fucking ridiculous. I don't have time. I need to pack. But I don't want to pack. I'm covered in dust! Urgh...

ok fine.... it's really no one's fault... I'm just really edgy coz I leave in 2 days, I've got to rush articles. My review has gone missing (AGAIN) and among other things, I'm still not packed not to mention my voicce is still... Well gone. Irritating isn't it? It sure as hell is. I'm fighting all urge to go against the doctors' advice and light up. Ah well...

Oh, one more person to add to the list of people who've told me goodbye. Saf messaged me the other day from Canada. He's coming back on the 9th apparently. Well all the same, bye. And please try find my VCDs eh? I still want them! They've been with you for what looks like is going to be over a year! Sheesh!!

Rick, Kenny, Drey, Ben, Marisa... I doubt I'll be seeing you guys till I come home. Luke, see you on wednesday. :) The press conference with the British-American God himself was amazing.

Why is it that EVERY SINGLE FUCKING TIME I TRY AND GET MY STUFF DONE. YOU ALWAYS HAVE TO FUCKING COME IN AND RUIN MY WHOLE MOOD.

What is so wrong with me that I cannot have a normal life. Why do you people always have to make everything so damned difficult. I wonder if you even care.

Coming to you live from McDonald's Forum...

NEIL GAIMAN IS THE COOLEST D00DE ALIVE!!! I HAVE MY BOOK SIGNED!!! w00t w00t w00t!!!
The press was kinda blah though... Wish my throat weren't so shitty then I would've been the ONE person to ask something remotely related to Sandman and something that can't be find off the net for crying out loud. Seriously, I'm looking at a website that's been up for THE LONGEST time with all the questions the PROFESSIONAL Singaporee media asked. Damned voice. Why'd you have to die out on me. Damnit....

Either way, Luke had a great time and he got my booked signed! It says "Melissa Sweet Dreams Neil Gaiman" obviously I left out the punctuation. And yes, I am going to email him. :)

Rick, Ben... Was nice seeing you two again. I I could've gone to Nu with you yesterday. Haha... Too tired... Well my loves, I will miss you and all of the crazy antics. You two are irreplaceable.

By the way, I wanted to say hi to one other person who sould know who he is. You have my stuff!!!!! I want my stuff!!! But all the same, I'm glad I didn't get to see you. Would've killed my mood.

Well that's just one person who I'm sure by now everyone knows that I'm extremely happy wasn't there. Everyone else either didn't get my message or was missed (I'm sorry!!!) But these 2 people were specifically left out. Good riddance.

I go shop now!! Come on iTrip!! :D Go Crumpler!!

My voice is gone but I don't care. I had a helluva good time last night! 1 bourbon, 4 or 5 or was it 3 Chivas... I can't really remember... And 3 Flaming Lambourgini. There was supposed to be a 4th but thankfully Tav took it for me. By the end of the night... I was seriously dead tired. I didn't even know if I'd be able to open the door on my own! :P

Anyways, thank you for coming. I really am going to miss all of you. You stupid idiot. You know who you are... You make me cry!!!! Irritating... I'm going to miss you the most. My stupid little boyfriend ahahaha...

I got a whole load of cool stuff too! I got this Beer College Game thing from Dhan, cards with heart warming notes, a gorgeous red glass that teaches you how to make Cuba Libre (whatever that is...),my beloved Grim Brothers book... And it goes on. Silly Daniel. You blew the cover. I knew ya'll were either gonna get me "Hanging Out With the Dream King" which by the way I sorely wanted or something or other from Kino. And thank God it wasn't another deck coz I swear I wouldn't know what to do with it.

Mainey, Manda, I miss you guys... I hardly get to see you... Luke, Kenny... My greatest friends. Jin, Tav... Gawd I've been hanging out with you guys sooo much... I'm going to miss you guys to bits...

Liy, Mash, whatever happens, hang in there. Live the dream.

Jon, Jud, Cia it's going to be a long time till I see you again. A really long time. And I'm really going to miss you a lot... After everything that we've done and gone through. And Ian! I will always remember you and your cigarettes! And how you didn't want to give me!! And then gave me in the end. :)

Celia... I do not look like your bunny!!! But I'm taking the cute thing as a compliment ahaha! You come visit me too ok? And gimme your Aussie number!!!

Prasad. Prasad. Prasad. You and your slippers! And you wore shoes all for me :) MSN conversations will still happen wherever I am. Unless your in NS la :P

Geoff... You're right. There are no words to describe what we have. Only feelings and memories which are more important to me than anything else in this world. Yes, even Thess.

Karol Durga and Amelia. You all ar! Corny as hell... Please please please look me up when you guys are down. The dark room will never be the same without the lot of you :)

Daniel. I won't forget all the conversations we've had about the strangest of things. And I will miss discoursing with you. Believe in yourself. I believe in you.

Peter Li Jian Liang! :D You and the psycho cat pics and the adorable kitten thing. Hahaha :D And whatever did you mean by behaving yourself har? HAR???

I'm going to end with something that Cia wrote. That really brought me to tears. Or at least tears that I had to force back in.

"Dear Mel,
We will miss...
- reading tarot together
- smoking our lungs out
- discoursing religion
- your generous heart
- bitching about love
- your gothic spirit
- your undying friendship
- corroding our lives
- your constant supportiveness...

But what we would miss most of all, is you. Just you."

5 days to go. Today is the day I officially say goodbye to all my friends and a sad ttfn. Everyone who's close to me will be there tonight. My closest friends. The people who know the real me be it psychotic, addicted or just plain old Mel. I look forward to seeing all of you again. And thank you again in advance for everything. I want to say it was really great times. Tonight is gonna be another night for the history books and so will all the other parties including the MeL Christmas party that's already in talks. :D

Take care pets. I'm feeling too nostalgic and sappy to really post properly at this point.

What I really do know is, it's still all too surreal to me. And I really am going to miss home.