It's been a long long month. And it's only the 4th! So now what's going to happen. Honestly. I suppose things can only get better? I don't want to jinx it. I've got quite a bit on my plate at the moment but I will say this. No more tears. None. I refuse to let things get to me. I refuse to crumble.

Life has chosen to deal me the same old cards over and over again. I can't quite say I'm complaining though. My eyes are opening to things that I never noticed before. It's quite a picture I'll tell you that. It's beautiful and cruel. But that's the way things have and will always be.

I think I'm beginning to understand how living and surviving in Uni works. At least in Australia. In fact it's not just limited to Australia or Uni. But let's not get into that. Life likes throwing you a curve ball. It brings together people from completely different walks of life. They enter your life and become one with yours only to have to leave it. I've gotten so used to people carving a life for themselves within mine that sometimes I can't bare to see them just waltz right out of it. It's not like I have a choice in the matter don't you think?

It's times like these that I feel old, stretched and all that. Nothing more can happen that's going to surprise me anymore. The feeling is called jaded. It's a pity that at 20 I already am. These are supposed to be the best times of a persons life. So said my brother to me a long long time ago. Maybe he's right, maybe he isn't. He may not have lived the best life and he may have made his own fair share of mistakes. But... I think he got it right somewhere along the way before a curve ball hit him. I miss him terribly. I do.

I was woken up today by a phone call and I must say I was relieved. I had been having a very weird dream about well... I rather not mention it. It's just one of those things that I'd rather forget. As well as the people who were in it. Well, I can't and won't forget them. Besides, a dream is just a dream is it not? A dream is just a dream. Besides, I was so tired that I fell asleep watching Ocean's 12. What else is new pets? I've been so drained I can even fall asleep while watching Bleach. Nothing new. Nothing new at all.

And that sums up everything that's been happening this sem. Nothing new. Nothing new at all.