love is to pain as fire is to water

You want and then you don't want. And when I want you don't want. And when you want I don't want. Irritating. Is it so difficult to get what I want? Seriously. Am I asking for too much. Has it become that difficult? Or have I over complicated things again.

What is it about me? Please, someone explain this concept to me. Either that or someone point a fucking gun to my head and shoot. I'm frustrated.

I don't know anymore. How can a person like more than one person at a time? How can a person love more than one person at a time. I don't understand it at all. How can so much pain bring so much happiness. Someone explain that concept to me. Pain is not love and love is not pain. I know love. I know pain. They are different.

And yet... I find myself conflicted. I still wish that you were here.