withstanding all of hell

You know what's ironic? The song Iris. It is ironic to me. I am still very close to giving up everything just to be ok. But then again that doesn't count because giving up everything equates to me not being ok does it. It's even more ironic how one can be the furthest and yet closest to heaven I can be. Technically speaking.

I won't give it up. No matter what I'm not going to give it up. I'll fight as much as it takes. Whether people give up on me and whether or not I win, I'll still fight. I won't ever give up. Not on this. Not on you. The only thing I won't fight are the tears. I'll let them be the last remaining thing was is real. If I have to hide myself from the world I will. I will do whatever it takes.

Be strong. I don't want to be the liability. I don't want to be your weakness. If there ever comes a time when you need me, I'll be there. I don't quite know what I can do but I'll be there as the one person that refuses to break. And I think we all know why. I love you. And with regards to Iris, I don't see the need for me to want you to know and see who or what I am because you already do.

Bring it on. I am ready to face whatever trials await me. After all, this is still only the beginning of a long and winding road. I don't expect you guys to walk with me. I don't expect anyone to come with me. But this is my choice and I choose to believe. If my nightmares have to be my reality, then I'll live it. What is a nightmare but a dream.