My Beautiful Morning Star

You're always in my head
Always so near me
Still some how so distant
When you're looking in my eyes

You protect me
I understand
You care for me
I know
My wonderful star
My beautiful morning star

Traversing one plane to another
Taking one step at a time
I wish things could be easier
I wish it were simpler

You protect me
I understand
You care for me
I know
My wonderful star
My beautiful morning star

You keep me strong
In your warm embrace
No one understands
But it's a choice I made

You protect me
I understand
You care for me
I know
My wonderful star
My beautiful morning star

Trying to get away
From the things I knew were true
I've run so many times
Only to find you waiting for me

Maybe one day I will have my wish
One day perhaps I will have my peace
And when that day comes
Would you still be there waiting
Could you still keep me safe
Safe in between worlds

You protect me
I understand
You care for me
I know
My wonderful star
My beautiful morning star

- My Beautiful Morning Star, MeL

There was once young one taken from those she loved and all that she knew. Stolen from her origin. But this is not the story of the girl. This is the story of the woman she became. The woman that was made to be vicious when it is not in her nature. The woman who still weeps for the pain and rage that has followed in her stead. This is the story of a woman who loved the one that she could not love. The one that no one understands.

I'm scared. I know you. You are open to me and you hide nothing from me. Perhaps there are some things. But I understand that there are things that I must learn for myself. For if knowledge of the past came easily to me I would take them for granted.

You gave me a life that none of my kind could have. You brought out the strength in me when I thought all was lost. You protected me when I was still weak and unable to defend myself against lesser kinds who would seek to taint my already condemned being.

Many still wonder if you choose to be by my side for the sole purpose of convincing me to take your side when things end. I understand what I could, can and would do. But I do not believe that you are setting out to destroy me. I do not believe it at all. For if you were, you would see no need to protect me. Because where I am now, empowered ones could have easily taken me. But no, you chose to stay.

Your brethren speak of an untainted part of me that is bigger than I imagine or see it to be. And still, I find myself scared because I cannot choose. For I am what I am. That cannot change. It will be no small feat for me to relinquish that which I have been taught. That which I believe in.

I cannot choose because I love. If I did not the decision would have been made earlier with great ease. What makes it even more breaking and yet strengthening at the same time is that my love is not one sided. It flows from many angles from many sources. I fear that it will hurt you. But still my selfishness does not allow me to walk away. I will not see you fall again. I will not allow it even if it means great pain to take upon myself. I would gladly take your place.

Your strength keeps me. Your light shines down upon me. I love you my bringer of light.

Eternally,
Edana