Goodbye What If

I've just been a walking time bomb these days. I'm feeling a lot better though. And it's about time I start taking charge of my life right? A bunch of people are going to St. Kilda later. I'm not sure if I'm going to go with them though. I know I have this insane need to go out and do things but... Some how I think my need to go out has just transferred itself into my need to go back to Hush. How pathetic is that?? Sheesh!

I suppose I need to get started on something new. I'm not sure what just yet. I've been playing FFX-2 again. I've been playing nearly every day now. And I think you were right. I know you were right but I'm beginning to see it materialise now. I'm just taking aspects of myself and twisting it aren't I? I haven't changed at all. And come to think of it, maybe it isn't such a bad thing to stick to being me and just dropping things that I stopped doing or liking.

Yesterday, we went to Chapel Street on the pretenses of having coffee. I on the other hand decided I wanted a Stella. Hehe. So that made last nights roll of drinks 3 sex on the beaches, a hoegaarden and a stella. Not too bad actually. But I must put a cap on the drinking habits. I'm going to drink myself insane if I don't eh? I guess... I'm looking forward to you coming. I'm waiting and waiting and waiting. But at the back of my mind lies the fear that something might happen and you won't be able to come. It's something that I land up having with regards to almost every thing. It's the what if it doesn't happen. What if what if what if. There's one thing I want to drop. The What if's. And we all know I'm going to need a substantial amount of luck for that. But hey, I think I can do it so there.