Reiterations

After much careful consideration, I have established the fact that you are not what I want. Please refrain from assuming that you are. If there is anything that I could ever want of you, it would be you being a friend.. I'm sorry if you can't accept that. I may love you but you are not what I want nor are you what I need. It's not nice to take the place of someone you clearly are not. More than anything I need a friend who gives a damn enough to know what's going on. Surprisingly, you don't. Pity. I shan't expect anything more of you shall I.

I'm insanely exhausted. Kinda cheesed that I always seem to be doing all the dirty work for absolutely nothing. Initially I wanted to do things properly to at least get some kind of credential. But now, I am beginning to realise just how much you people are using me. From people I thought were my friends to people who are family. You know what? If you want to go on like that then so be it. Even as I write this I contemplate the repercussions of putting what I'm saying online. Evidently, nothing is ever private. And apparently everything is aimed at everybody except the one person they are all meant for.

I still stand by my decision. Chances are, I will leave. And you will not hear from me again. Harsh? I call it necessary. Angry are you? Don't be. You have no reason to be. I'm not angry with you either. I'm just reiterating this as clearly as I possible can. I have the opportunity to restart my life completely. I have the chance to leave everything behind. And I'm taking it. I will leave everything that doesn't need to know what I'm doing. I'm dropping it like the Americans dropped bombs on Iraq and Afghanistan. Only mine will hardly destroy anything. How can I destroy or severe anything when there is nothing there?

Go ahead, do what you must. It's your life to live. No wait... It's not must is it. It's want. Go on, I dare you. Take it. Why is it I see that you can't. No matter how much you try. Because you plain don't have any confidence in yourself. Go. What're you waiting for? The world is your oyster isn't it? You have everything you want don't you? You don't need us. Oh no, I shouldn't be speaking for others should I? Fine. You don’t need me. You can take care of yourself. Pity though, I was beginning to get pretty dependent on you. You know how I keep telling you there is always a reason for everything? Well, there is. And what goes around come around. Don’t you ever forget it.

We’ll probably hang out soon. But until then, goodbye.